Can't stop Smiling

For a long time now I have been unhappy.  I felt like I forgot how to smile and laugh.  I'd cry on Sunday nights because work started the next day.  Crazy thing is that work itself is not terrible.  Its a job.  Its a safe environment.  The paycheck is always there.  Insurance though not the best I've seen was good.  But over time it seemed like the company I joined.  The one who cared about its employees and helped them balance their lives disappeared.  I asked a Director how she balanced work and life in hopes of help.  Her reply?  "Hire someone to take care of the life stuff"  So work/life balance had become I work and hire someone else to live my life.  This didn't work for me.  My kids need me.  My pocketbook can't afford to hire someone to live my life.  No longer did I feel appreciated.  I felt replaceable.  Just a number and one they would be all to happy to get rid of.  If it was just me I could have believed it was me.  I searched for signs that perhaps I was the problem.  But it seems to be a common feeling these days at the company.  And perhaps not everyone is unhappy but I can't seem to find the happy people.  I could have used them to try to bounce back from the funk.  People leave and are not replaced.  Employees are working the job of 3 or even 5 people.  Everyone is stressed and there doesn't seem to be a plan (or not one they are sharing).  We can't see the light.  But today I was smiling.  I laughed.  I kept thinking that at least I had a light at the end of the tunnel.  I don't know where it leads but for the first time in a long time I'm excited.  I don't mind I'm ignored.  I don't mind anything.  Come June I will be free.  I realize the grass is not always greener.  I fear that I might be making the wrong choice.  But then I think about how I smiled all day. How I feel a weight has been lifted with this choice.